Jackson, the 106-year-old Dyspepsi-Cola Veteran

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Jackson, the 106-year-old Dyspepsi-Cola Veteran
Jackson, the 106-year-old Dyspepsi-Cola Veteran

Well, now! Back for more, eh? Well, sonny, I beat you eighty-five years ago and I'll beat you again. Just you wait while I fetch my sword. Did you know, in the war, we couldn't even get toffee? Yup, toffee was rationed. There were days when I would have gladly killed a man for a piece of toffee. Couldn't get no limes, either. Dyspepsi's Navy needed 'em. Wards off scurvy, y'know. I remember the posters they used to have: "If You're Eating Toffee, You're Aiding Cloaca-Cola!", "The Road to Hell is Paved with Limes and Toffee!"

Wait, what was I talking about, whippersnapper? Oh, yeah. I was about to kill you, wasn't I? Take this! Dangit, I forgot to pull the pin. Anyway, back in my days in the Dyspepsi-Cola Infantry, we... zzzzzz...

Dyspepsi.gifYou acquire an item: Dyspepsi grenade

Occurs while Trick or Treating in the Cloaca-Cola Uniform.


  • The old soldier's name most likely refers to Michael Jackson, who was a spokesperson for Pepsi in the 1980s.
  • Dyspepsi-Cola is a reference to Pepsi Cola.