Gaudy pirate
From TheKolWiki
 You're fighting a gaudy pirateAs you shield your eyes from the glare, you can make out the form of a pirate in a gold lamé vest, covered in sequins and spangles. He certainly looks farrrbulous, and what with all the shiny trinkets he's wearing, you can tell he's got a real flair for piracy. I mean, pirates are only required to wear a few pieces of flair, but extra flair shows extra dedication.
Hit Message(s):
He does a high-kicking, show-girl dance. Unfortunately, he's standing way too close to you, and keeps kicking you in the chin. Oof! Eek! Argh! Oof! Ow!
He smacks you with a ring-encrusted hand. Argh! Ugh! Ouch!
He blinds you with the gleam from his gold lamé vest. His purple toupee doesn't help much, either. Oof! Oof! Ooh! Ow!
He steps close to you and twirls around. The spangles, bangles, and beads on his bandanna act like a cat-o'-nine-tails. Oof! Argh! Argh!
Critical Hit Message:
He shows you a model building he's designed. It looks like a cake in a microwave -- all bulges and weirdness, with no right angles. When you criticize the model, he breaks it over your head.
Ugh! Ouch! Oof! Ooh!
Miss Message(s):
He does a high-kicking, show-girl dance. It's pretty entertaining.
He tries to smack you with his ring-hand, but you'll have none of that.
His gold lamé, combined with his purple toupee, turn your green around. It doesn't hurt much.
He stops attacking for a second to do a little dance. Thankfully, he doesn't follow that up with making a little love.
Fumble Message:
He shows you the plans he's drawn up for a new barrr in the Pirate's Cove. It looks like four giant, half-eaten corn-on-the-cob ears standing on end. You make fun of the design until he starts crying.
Occurs at Belowdecks.
Notes
- When you use the golden ring on him, you get this message:
The gaudy pirate's eyes light up at the sight of the ring.
"Oh my Goodness, that is FABULOUS!" he shouts, "I must have it!" He grabs the ring and stuffs a wad of Meat into your hand.
References
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