Dry noodle guide

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Fix all these numbers to be in line with the update that nuked the Wok ages ago.
Dry noodle cooking can be broken down into several types: basic, saucy, meins, lasagnas, and wontons.

Basic Dry Noodle

Pasta Dish Ingredient Adventures Stat gains Fullness
Bowl.gif
boring spaghetti
Tomato.gif
tomato
4-11 6-8 Beefiness,
6-8 Enchantedness,
6-8 Sarcasm
3
Bowl.gif
delicious noodles
Herbs.gif
herbs
4-12 9-25 Chutzpah 3
Bowl.gif
spicy noodles
Spice.gif
spices
6-12 - 3
Bowl.gif
delicious spicy noodles
Blend.gif
secret blend of herbs and spices
7-15 29-33 Wizardliness 3
Bowl.gif
painful penne pasta
Pepper.gif
jabañero pepper
5-13 17-20 Muscleboundness † 3
Bowl.gif
pr0n m4nic0tti
Pr0nlegs.gif
pr0n legs
8-14 28-30 Smarm 4
Bowl.gif
ravioli della hippy
Tofu.gif
wad of tofu
4-12 19-23 Wizardliness 3

† painful penne pasta will cause you to lose 20-23 HP.

Of these, the best is clearly the delicious spicy noodles offering 10.3 stats per fullness and 3.7 adventures per fullness. However, the difficulty with these is it requires spices and herbs. Spices may be difficult to obtain. Additionally, one could make significantly better chow meins with the herbs and spices.

Failing easy access to secret blends the next best for adventures at 3.2 adventures per fullness and with acceptable stats at 6.0 stats per fullness is the painful penne pasta, though this also requires access to the hermit for the jabañero pepper.

Without touching the hermit, boring spaghetti and ravioli della hippy both offer 7.0 stats per fullness. Spaghetti offers 2.5 adventures per fullness while ravioli della hippy is 2.7 adventures per fullness. The advantage of boring spaghetti is the easy tomato drops at low levels and that one can buy tomatoes from the hippy store later in the game if needed.

Delicious noodles are a reasonable choice if one is trying to work on moxie offering slightly better adventures per fullness at 2.8, though lower stats per fullness at 5.7.

Pr0n m4nic0tti is now a viable choice with 2.8 adventures per fullness and 7.X stats per fullness.

Reagent dishes (Saucy dry noodles)

Food name Base food item Sauce name Adventure Gain Stat gain
Bowl.gif
fettucini Inconnu
Goatcheese.gif
goat cheese
Gravy.gif
fancy schmancy cheese sauce
17 - 20 25 - 30 Wizardliness
Bowl.gif
gnocchetti di Nietzsche
Mushroom.gif
Knob mushroom
Gravy.gif
Himalayan Hidalgo sauce
21 - 28 47 - 52 Enchantedness
Bowl.gif
spaghetti with Skullheads
Sausage.gif
Knob sausage
Gravy.gif
sauce of the ages
21 - 28 47 - 52 Strengthliness
Bowl.gif
Hell ramen
Cube.gif
hellion cube
Menudo.gif
Hell broth
22 - 28 23 - 28 in each stat and meat
Bowl.gif
spaghetti con calaveras
Candyskull.gif
marzipan skull
Gravy.gif
Salsa de las Epocas
22 - 26 23 - 52 Beefiness

There are five saucy dry noodles, of which four are about the same - one working for each stat. All sauce dishes are 6 fullness items meaning that without Stomach of Steel, one can only eat two a day. With Stomach of Steel, one is able to eat three per day.

Hell ramen is the best of the set with the most stats per fullness at 12.8. The other three offer 8.3 stats per fullness, though in a particular area. This makes them choice dishes for Stat Days where the 25% bonus can be used with best efficiency.

Although the spaghetti con calaveras requires learning the recipe from the April Shower, one can purchase a marzipan skull if they have access to the Gno-Mart, a distinct advantage over the other dishes.

All Sauce dishes offer about 4.2 adventures per fullness.

Lo meins

Lo Mein Base Ingredient Adventures Stat gains Fullness
Bowl.gif
asparagus lo mein
Stalk.gif
stalk of asparagus
9-16 10-14 Beefiness
12-16 Magicalness.
3
Bowl.gif
Knob lo mein
Mushroom.gif
Knob mushroom
14-20 30-34 Mysteriousness 4
Bowl.gif
Knoll lo mein
Bmushroom.gif
Knoll mushroom
14-21 30-34 Strengthliness 4
Bowl.gif
olive lo mein
Olive.gif
olive
9-16 10-14 Beefiness
10-14 Roguishness
3
Bowl.gif
spooky lo mein
Spooshroom.gif
spooky mushroom
14-21 30-34 Chutzpah 4

Lo meins are the lowest tier of all three meins. They can be cooked using Pastamastery by cooking dry noodles with a first-tier stir fry (the base ingredient cooked with a secret blend of herbs and spices). With access to the Mushroom Fields, the mushroom lo meins are much superior to delicious spicy noodles, especially since the mushrooms only cost 30-50 meat (and a day). It does, however, consume two adventures instead of one (without chef-in-the-box).

Scrumdiddlyumptious Noodles

Noodles in this category require sauces made with the Way of Sauce skill and bottles of scrumdiddlyumptious solution.

Food name Base food item Sauce name Adventure Gain Stat gain Fullness Level
Bowl.gif
Fettris
Whiterussian.gif
imitation White Russian
Gravy.gif
Alexy sauce
21-23-?  ?-41-43-? Fortitude 5 11
Bowl.gif
fusillocybin
Squashfrog.gif
colorful toad
Gravy.gif
rainbow sauce
22 44 Magicalness 5 11
Bowl.gif
libertagliatelle
Opensauce.gif
open sauce
Gravy.gif
Salsa Libre
19-22 35-40 Mysteriousness 5 10
Bowl.gif
linguini of the sea
Sushipiece.gif
stolen sushi
Gravy.gif
illicit fish sauce
19-22 35-40 Cheek 5 10
Bowl.gif
prescription noodles
Pillcup.gif
pill cup
Gravy.gif
drug cocktail sauce
23 43 Cheek 5 11
Bowl.gif
turkish mostaccioli
Bigturkeyleg.gif
giant turkey leg
Gravy.gif
good gravy
19-22 35-40 Fortitude 5 10

Scrumdiddlyumptious Noodles replaced Chow Mein as an intermediate noodle between lo mein and hi mein

Hi meins

Hi Mein Base Sauce Pulverize a... (Lvl available) Adventures Muscle Mysticality Moxie Fullness
Bowl.gif
cold hi mein
Goodgravy.gif
cold and sour sauce
Coldchucks.gif
frozen nunchaku (8)
24-27 70-75 30-35 15-20 5
Bowl.gif
hot hi mein
Goodgravy.gif
hot and sour sauce
Buckler1.gif
demon buckler (6)
24-27 70-75 15-20 30-35 5
Bowl.gif
sleazy hi mein
Goodgravy.gif
sleazy and sour sauce
Buffsword.gif
buffalo blade (6)
24-27 25-30 25-30 70-75 5
Bowl.gif
spooky hi mein
Goodgravy.gif
spooky and sour sauce
Spikebone.gif
spiked femur (6)
24-27 15-20 70-75 30-35 5
Bowl.gif
stinky hi mein
Goodgravy.gif
stench and sour sauce
Lihcface.gif
lihc face (7)
24-27 30-35 70-75 15-20 5

Hi meins are an improved type of chow mein. They are created by cooking elemental sour sauces with savory dry noodles. The skill Transcendental Noodlecraft and the item MSG are required to create savory dry noodles. The Way of Sauce is required to make the elemental sour sauces. You must be able to Pulverize equipment to get half of the ingredients for the elemental sour sauces, or buy them at the mall which means being out of Ronin.

There are several disadvantages to hi meins that offset their advantages. Access to The Malus of Forethought is only available to Muscle classes, while MSG can only be bought by Mysticality classes or Accordion Thieves. Additionally, hi meins all have a level requirement of 12, making them solidly an aftercore food. Players who remain in Hardcore despite being over level 12, perhaps for PvP, will find themselves unable to craft them at all, unless they happen to be Turtle Tamers willing to enter Hobopolis to tame some boxcar turtles.

Lasagnas

Lasagna Base Food Seasoning Casserole Adventures Stat Gains Fullness
Lasagna.gif
gnat lasagna
Gnatfilet.gif
filet of tangy gnat ("fotelif")
Disease.gif
ancient spice
Casserole.gif
gnatloaf casserole
11-18 45-55 Beefiness 3
Lasagna.gif
long pork lasagna
Longpork.gif
long pork
Blpepper.gif
black pepper
Casserole.gif
long pork casserole
11-18 45-55 Wizardliness 3
Lasagna.gif
fishy fish lasagna
Fish.gif
displaced fish
Disease.gif
dehydrated caviar
Casserole.gif
fishy fish casserole
11-18 45-55 Sarcasm 3

Lasagnas are slightly less effective than chow meins and they can not be eaten until level 10. Lasagnas only require 2 ingredients, compared to 4 for the chow meins. However, each lasagna includes ingredients not available until level 11.

Wontons

Wonton McMillicancuddy Item Base Food Food Adventures Stats Adv/Full Fullness Level
Wonton.gif
sausage wonton
Beerbottle.gif
McMillicancuddy's Special Lager
Brat.gif
frat brats
Brat.gif
beer basted brat
12-18 50-80 Muscleboundness,
20-30 Magicalness,
20-30 Sarcasm
5 3 12
Wonton.gif
tofu wonton
Tofu.gif
megatofu
Soupbowl.gif
mixed wildflower greens
Crimbowl2.gif
super salad
11-18 20-30 Strengthliness,
50-80 Wizardliness,
20-30 Smarm
4.83 3 12

Each wonton requires an ingredient available only after completing the Defowl the Farm quest during level 12 and either visiting the farm or obtaining an instant rations kit. The sausage wonton, which is comparable to a chow mein, is slightly better than the tofu wonton, which is comparable with the lasagna. As with the lasagna, they only require 2 ingredients, and may be more helpful in Aftercore than a regular run.

Obsolete Items

Hammockbrogre.gif This content has been retired and is no longer available in game.

The items below used to be part of the noodle strategy before being removed from the game.

Chow mein

Food name Stir-fry Protein Adventures Stat Gains Fullness
Bowl.gif
tofu chow mein
Chorizo.gif
asparagus stir-fry
Tofu.gif
wad of tofu
11-19 18-22 Strongness
20-25 Magicalness
3
Bowl.gif
pr0n chow mein
Chorizo.gif
olive stir-fry
Pr0nlegs.gif
pr0n legs
16-24 20-26 Beefiness
20-26 Sarcasm
4
Bowl.gif
Knob sausage chow mein
Chorizo.gif
Knoll stir-fry
Sausage.gif
Knob sausage
21-28 72-76 Strengthliness 5
Bowl.gif
bat wing chow mein
Chorizo.gif
Knob stir-fry
Batwing.gif
bat wing
21-28 70-75 Wizardliness 5
Bowl.gif
rat appendix chow mein
Chorizo.gif
spooky stir-fry
Appendix.gif
rat appendix
21-28 70-75 Smarm 5

The chow mein dishes were some of the best foods in the Kingdom. They all required a secret blend of herbs and spices, dry noodles, MSG and one or two other ingredients. You needed Pastamastery to summon the dry noodles and Transcendental Noodlecraft to create chow mein. Generally, the tofu and pr0n chow meins were considered separate from the other chow meins, due to their lower fullness, lower stat boosts, and irregular recipes.

On July 7, 2015, all chow mein dishes were replaced with simpler items.

Cooking
Strategy | Discoveries | Pastamastery | Transcendental Noodlecraft | The Wok of Ages | Tempuramancy
Food | Best Foods
Sushi | Pastas | Chow meins | Hi meins | Lo meins | Pizza | Pies | Tacos