Bazookafish
From TheKolWiki
 You're fighting a bazookafishThis fish is a tragic example of arms escalation in marine life. It started with box turtles, who had abnormally large fists. Then the hammerhead sharks got involved, then daggerfish, swordfish, and scimitarfish. Finally, in the interest of defending themselves (and making scientists' heads explode), fish began evolving small arms -- you may have seen the revolverfish and the double-barreled- shotgunfish.
The end result is this fish, which has a fully functioning bazooka growing out of its nose. It's here to blow you up and chew bubblegum, and you better hope it doesn't run out of bubblegum.
Hit Message(s):
It bazookawhips you. If you thought pistolwhipping was painful, you clearly were unprepared. Argh! Argh! Oof!
It fires a missile at you. It misses, but the resulting shockwave leaves your ears ringing. Argh! Oof! Oof!
It swims up and smacks you with its tail. Well, that was anticlimactic. Argh! Ugh! Ooh!
Critical Hit Message:
It fires a missile at you, which hits you square in the toe. You feel like kissing someone. Wait, no, you just feel searing pain.Eek! Argh! Ouch! Ooh! Eek! Eek! Ugh! Argh!
Miss Message(s):
It tries to bazookawhip you, but gives itself whiplash.
It fires a missile at you, but misses.
It tries to smack you with its tail, but you turn tail and run.
Fumble Message:
It fires a missile at you, but instead of exploding, the missile stops to do some physics equations. Must be one of those "smart" missiles.
  Meat | You gain 176-264 Meat. (average: 220, stdev: 17.96)* |
Occurs at The Brinier Deepers.
References
- "It's here to blow you up and chew bubblegum, and you better hope it doesn't run out of bubblegum" is a play on Roddy Piper's famous line from They Live.
- Its presence on this particular monster is also a reference to Bazooka bubble gum.
- The critical hit message is a reference to the tradition of kissing someone under the mistletoe.
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