Bar
From TheKolWiki
 You're fighting a barYou are attacked by a bar. Yup. I reckon there's a lot of bar in these here woods. Boy howdy.
Hit Message(s):
Well, that ol' bar just about clawed himself a nice big hole in your <foot>, I reckon. Ooh! Eek! Ow!
The bar tries to show his tender side, but he's never heard of a tender bar (or a bar tender) so just ends up biting you. Ooh! Oof! Eek!
Critical Hit Message:
You remember hearing once that bars can't run downhill, so you take off running. Turns out that whoever told you that was full of crap, though -- the bar tackles you and mauls you pretty comprehensively. Ow!
Miss Message(s):
Well, that ol' bar tried to claw you right in the <foot>, but I reckon he missed.
The bar starts to attack, but suddenly needs to go do that thing that bars do in the woods.
Fumble Message:
The bar charges at you, but gets distracted by a nearby pot labeled "HUNNY."
Monster-Specific Hit Message:
Your attack severs the bar's arm, effectively violating his second amendment rights. You commie. You do X damage, Comrade. SOCKO! KAPOW! BONK!
Occurs at The Spooky Forest.
References
- The dialect and phrases in this adventure lampoon the narrative style of country singer Waylon Jennings from the classic American television series The Dukes of Hazzard.
- "Bar" may also reference the folk hero Davy Crockett, who "killed him a bar when he was only three."
- The second missed attack refers to the cliché, "Does a bear shit in the woods?" It is a common response to a yes/no question wherein the answer is an obvious "yes."
- The "pot of HUNNY" fumble message refers to Winnie-the-Pooh.
- "Bär" is German for "bear."
- The monster-specific hit message refers to the right to bear arms. The joke is that "bear" can mean the monster you're fighting or "to possess."
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