Name:Lo "Commotion" Ping
Lo Ping began his assassin career as a traditional ninja; that is, as a deadly assassin who dresses in civilian clothes so he won't be spotted, who kills quietly and leaves behind no evidence of foul play. While this made him very effective in the art of murder, he spent countless hours explaining to slow-witted victims and witnesses that yes, he was, in fact, totally a ninja. Frustrated, he started wearing black pajamas, shrieking battle cries, and throwing shuriken. Now his assassinations are garish and scattershot, but at least he never again will say, "well, actually, the commonly accepted 'black pajama' uniform is a by-product of the way ninjas were portrayed in Japanese theatre. . ." because seriously, nobody likes that guy.
As an act of revenge against magicians everywhere, this card spends his spare time figuring out how to throw human beings and make them stick halfway into a watermelon.
Selling Price: 5 Meat.