A Crimbo Tale
A Crimbo Tale is located in the 2016 incarnation of Crimbo Town.
Brief History of
Crimbo is the one holiday in the Kingdom of Loathing that doesn't occur at a fixed date on the Loathing calendar. Its origins are shrouded in mystery (and, let's be honest, a peppermint-schnapps-fueled haze), but it generally involves a guy in a red, fur-trimmed suit and hat handing out presents to everyone. It's probably some kind of tax dodge.
Since the Naughty Sorceress took over the Kingdom, Crimbo has taken some interesting twists and turns over the years. If you're the kind of person who is interested in history and exposition, the following is a condensed version of the events of the last few Crimbo seasons:
Part I : The Story Thus Far
Part II : The Elfretariat
Part III : The Halloween Incident
Part IV : Crimboween
Part V : Where in Time is Uncle Crimbo?
Part VI : Once You Go Blackstory, You Never Go Backstory
Part VII : A Polyhedral Harbinger
Part VIII : Rise of the Crimborg
Part VIIII : A Black and White Crimbo
Part X : One More Indecent Accident
Part XI : Of CRIMBCO and Hobos
Part XII : I Want Candy
Part XIII : Dreaming of a KAWAIIII Crimbo
Part XIV : Cyborg Bears? Sure Why Not
Part XV : Factory Complexities
Part XVI : A Tale of Two Things That Happened
Actually, even if you're not the kind of person who cares about history and exposition, that's a recap of the past few Crimbo seasons. But if you're not the kind of person who will enjoy reading it, don't read it. I'd hate for you to go out of your way, or anything. I mean, it's not like I spent hours writing this just so you could have the pleasure of reading it. I don't mind.
- The title of the tale is a reference to the 1988 book A Brief History of Time: From the Big Bang to Black Holes by physicist Stephen Hawking.
- Part V is a play on the 1989 video game Where in Time Is Carmen Sandiego?
- Part VI is a play on the saying "Once you go black, you never go back."
- Part XII is a reference to the 1965 song "I Want Candy" by the band The Strangeloves.
- Part XIII is a play on the 1942 song "White Christmas" by Irving Berlin.
- Part XVI is a play on the 1859 novel A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens.