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7-Foot Dwarf (Royale)

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7-Foot Dwarf
Monster ID unknown
Locations Itznotyerzitz Mine
Hit Points 40
Attack 53
Defense 53
No-Hit 63
Initiative 60
Meat 32-48
Phylum humanoid
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts Indeterminate
Drops
7-Foot Dwarven mattock, miner's helmet, miner's pants
edit data
7-Foot Dwarf You're fighting a 7-Foot Dwarf

This is one of the unusually tall Dwarves who works Itznotyerzitz Mine. You know what they'd call this Dwarf in Paris? A Royale Dwarf.

Hit Message(s):

He picks a fight with you, and fights with his pick. Ooh! Ow!

He pulls out a smaller pick and nitpicks you in the <arm>. Ugh! Ooh!

He flies off the handle and hits you with the handle of his pick. Man, you wish he'd learn to play the guitar and stop picking on you. Argh! Oof! Argh! Ugh! Oof!

He shines the light on his helmet straight into your eyes, blinding you. Now you're revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night. Eek! Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Ow!

Critical Hit Message:

He sheathes his pick and pulls out a dwarven axe. He throws the axe at you and it buries itself in your eye. Man, you didn't axe for this much hassle.Ow! Eek! Ooh! Ooh!

Miss Message(s):

He tries to pick on you, but misses.

He tries to nitpick you, but your nits steadily refuse to be picked.

He tries to hit you with his pick, but the head flies off the handle before he can connect. Man, he should be careful about flying off the handle like that.

He tries to blind you with his helmet light, but can't seem to get it revved up properly.

Fumble Message:

He starts to pick on you again, but is distracted when one of the dwarvish call-girls walks by. He greets her with the traditional "hi, ho," before going back to work.


After Combat

Meat.gifYou gain 32-48 Meat
Mattock.gifYou acquire an item: 7-Foot Dwarven mattock (3.6% chance)*
Minerhat.gifYou acquire an item: miner's helmet (2.9% chance)*
Whitepants.gifYou acquire an item: miner's pants (3.3% chance)*
You gain 13-14 <substat>.

Occurs at Itznotyerzitz Mine.

References

  • The "Royale dwarf" joke comes from the famous exchange about what they call Quarter Pounders in France from Pulp Fiction.
  • "Revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night" is from the chorus to a well-known cover of the Bruce Springsteen song Blinded By The Light, done by Manfred Mann's Earth Band.
  • The pickaxe head miss message may be a reference to RuneScape, where when mining, the pickaxe head may go flying without warning.
  • The dwarf may be a reference to Captain Carrot from the Discworld series, who is a six-foot, six-inch adopted dwarf who is the heir of the throne of Ankh-Morpork, and thus, is royalty.

History

This page was last modified on 6 November 2012, at 12:50.
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